Conditions for thriving – walk this way

Photo by Brian Mann on Unsplash

 

Where are you on the continuum from surviving to thriving? 

I’m taking a look at the conditions for thriving over the next 6 weeks – a short video each week to start moving towards thriving.

Taking it gently, without judgement and most importantly, because it’s never the slog that will get us there, it’s the joy, enjoying the walk, let’s see where we get to…

 

Starting today

30/6 Week one – What is life for and in what manner would you like to live it?

Then a week each on John Ruskin’s three things considered necessary to be happy in our life’s work

7/7 Week two  – you must be fit for it

14/7 Week three – you must not do too much of it

21/7 Week four – you must have a sense of success in it.

“Not a not a doubtful sense, such as needs some testimony of others for its confirmation, but a sure sense, or rather knowledge, that so much work has been done well, and fruitfully done, whatever the world may say or think about it.”

28/7 Week five – the qualities you particularly bring and can give life to

4/8 Week six –  find and establish your own everyday practices that will build the conditions in which you thrive into your life

Could you do with a gentle move towards thriving?

I’d love to have you join me

I’ve been working with a group for over a year in this way to make significant shifts through simply bringing our attention consistently to the things we’d like to change. It’s a gentle, kind way of bringing about change. No push, struggle, determination or hard work has been required.

Acceptance, without the tense energy of resistance or shame, of where you’re starting, with at least a sense of wanting to move somewhere and then the consistent attention to it.

Want to try it?  There’s no cost…  imagine it’s like a summer walk along the beach together

 

You can have each week’s instalment sent straight to your inbox – sign up in the box, top right on the blog page where it says ‘news- how to make business better’. Or just come back on Friday afternoons.

I’d love to hear your thoughts or what you notice as you start to consider these things… come and share your thoughts in the comments

Ready?

Here we go, Week One

 

By Pauline | Posted in Challengers of the status quo, Ease, Equality, Just how alive are you | Tagged , , |

Give Peace a Year – meeting twenty four

Image Silvestri Matteo at Unsplash

With the aim of peace everywhere,

 starting here and now, transforming violence and conflict of needs  in life, one word, thought or deed at a time.

We have now given peace a year!

The big review is complete.

Upon reflection we see that priceless things have been happening.

For which we say thank you, and

 MORE! 

We are going to give peace another year. 

Give Peace a Year²

 

The priceless things and how the first year went

We started on the 11th February 2016 and it’s been quite a year in the world.  We’ve been glad to be together ‘giving peace a year’ during this year of upheaval in many ways.   

A year of words, thoughts and deeds in our lives, that felt violent to us, brought to be given a dose of our collective attention.

Sometimes looking for ideas of how to change things, other times it’s empathy we’re in need of, feeling shocked to find violence right there in our seemingly peaceful selves.

The most effective thing, as far as peacemaking goes, and most appreciated, has been having the space to think. A space where it feels safe to bring anything, even things that are distinctly not our best moment, and being heard without judgement. That, that acceptance, rather than ideas or suggestions for what to do, has been what brought us most peace. 

We’ve worked directly on specific examples of violence, in conflict at work, in business, conflict between family members, as well as the violence we hadn’t realised we’d been subjecting ourselves to. Always committed to finding a nonviolent, peaceful way to do things, no fighting for peace.

This, about light, from David Spangler of the Lorian Association for incarnational spirituality, rings true for what seems to have been happening as we have been gently giving peace a year.

“ Light does not attack or contest.

Light evokes itself within a sytem. It’s not so much that we send light to someone or someplace, as it is that we evoke through resonance their own Light or the light of that situation to emerge and to make itself known.

Light operates by changing the environment.

If I step into a dark room and switch on the light, the light doesn’t start fighting the darkness and forcing it to retreat.

The light simply is, and where it is, darkness cannot also be. Light alters the environment whether we’re talking about physical light or sacred Light.

In a strict sense there can be no warriors of Light. Rather there are light bearers, those who can bring into and evoke from a situation, potential for sacredness in expression.”

Extending this kindness towards ourselves, the space to be heard without judgement has been especially appreciated, and resulted in a growing presence of peace within us… it awakening…coming more to life.   

As the presence of peace has, without our being particularly conscious of it, grown within us, things have changed in our environment. Several situations that had historically been way less than fun than is good for our health, and where sniping back and forth was the pattern, surprisingly, didn’t pan out the way they had in the past. The habitual retort just wasn’t there, or it was spotted making its way out but dissolved before making it out into words.

These were instances where we hadn’t worked on the situation at all nor brought them to the group, and without our doing anything, it has been more peaceful.

This is a joy to me. Amongst all the calls for fighting for things, anything… and the valuing of hard work, effort and striving and sacrifice and so on… living amongst all that and to find things changing effortlessly. That it changed through our having changed our being. And that we’d changed our being by gently and regularly bringing our attention to it.

Stunning!

Does that feel pretty stunning to you?

It does to me… I feel a hallelujah! coming on.

Absolutely fan bloody tastic!

*big wide eyed smile of happiness that this really can be so*

It seems that, in these instances, we are being peace.

Being peace bearers.

No-one’s looking for a sainthood or polishing their halo… it’s in small, human, day to day life situations we’ve found the increased presence of peace, and there are many, many  situations where things aren’t peaceful at all.

And, that the presence of peace has grown in any way, as we have given it our attention throughout the year, we are happy. And declaring that worth it. 

.And we say thank you, and

MORE! 

We’re going to give peace another year. 

Give Peace a Year²

 

.The group is full.

– You can however join an ‘interested when places are available’ list, just email me via the contact page.

 

And I will be working 1:1

in response to requests for individual coaching on the apparent ease of being and how to bring it into service in life and work.

-Email or call me if you’d like to see whether some of that might work for you.

This coaching offer might be a way to try it out without committing to more.

 

 

.

By Pauline | Posted in Give Peace a Year |

Give Peace a Year – Meeting twenty three

With the aim of peace everywhere,

 starting here and now, transforming violence and conflict of needs  in life, one word, thought or deed at a time.

Big Review

This was our second from last meeting and we spent it almost entirely in review, looking back at the road we’ve travelled this year.

Our last meeting will be on the 2nd February.

After that we’ll have heard from everyone who has taken part and write about

– what we’ve got from Giving Peace a Year,

– whether we want to continue,

and if so, are there any changes we’d like to make.

.

Next  and final, in person meeting for this ‘Give Peace a Year’

 

Thursday 2nd February, 7.30 – 9pm

The Salisbury Arms Hotel, Hertford

 

Guidelines for the group here

Email to let me know if you’re coming and we’ll keep you a seat

.

By Pauline | Posted in Give Peace a Year |

Give Peace a Year – Meeting twenty two

Photo Brooke Lark via Unsplash

With the aim of peace everywhere,

 starting here and now, transforming violence and conflict of needs  in life, one word, thought or deed at a time.

And because

it’s not the slog that will get us there, it’s the joy

for balance, things that warmed our hearts and made life a pleasure.

 

Starting where transformation is needed from the group of peace lovers this week on Thursday 5th January 2017

 

Mistake when booking tickets

Taking great care when booking train tickets and still booking the wrong date. The comments towards myself were not kind.

Empathy needed for the pain of the mistake and inconvenience of sorting it out and for the berating.

Starting with ourselves

This from Mary Mackenzie of The Nonviolent Communication Academy. It’s what we’ve been doing this year.

Many years ago, I felt utterly despairing that world peace was possible. And, then I realized that I was looking for it outside of myself – in my political leaders, supervisors, friends, ministers, and others. And, while I was looking for it outside of myself, I myself wasn’t acting peacefully in my everyday interactions with my family, friends, and others I encountered.

That was the moment when I realized that I can’t hope for world peace if I don’t hold it in my own heart, and that I didn’t need to be a powerful world leader to make a difference. My work is to bring peace to my own heart and extend it throughout whatever sphere of influence I have. Anything beyond that is someone else’s work. With this revelation, my despair was lifted and my focus clear.

What about you? What is your sphere of influence? Maybe in this moment bringing peace to your own heart is all the energy you can muster. I say yes to that! Maybe you want to dabble in bringing a new attitude to your workplace that will promote greater peace. Yes to that! Maybe you’d like to greet your partner or family with a kinder heart. Yes to that! Maybe living in compassion or forgiveness for yourself is where you are. Yes to that!

Mary Mackenzie NVC Academy

 

And the joy this time, much savouring has been had.

Pudding for breakfast

The Christmas mode that contains decadence in many ways. Brandy butter on toast for many days after Christmas until the tub was empty.  Lemon tart and cream for breakfast until it was used up.

Late afternoon DVD watching. 

Pootling. Letting things take the time they take and going at them in a really relaxed attentive way not the busy, brisk way of a normal day and enjoying the settled feeling and greater connection with things coming from that.

 

Next in person meeting

 

Thursday 19th January, 7.30 – 9pm

The Salisbury Arms Hotel, Hertford

Two meetings till the end of Give Peace a Year

Dates for the rest of the year here
Guidelines for the group here

Email to let me know if you’re coming and we’ll keep you a seat

.

 

By Pauline | Posted in Give Peace a Year |

Give Peace a Year – Meeting twenty one

Photo Dawid Zawila Unsplash

With the aim of peace everywhere,

 starting here and now, transforming violence and conflict of needs  in life, one word, thought or deed at a time.

And because

it’s not the slog that will get us there, it’s the joy

for balance, things that warmed our hearts and made life a pleasure.

 

Starting where transformation is needed from the group of peace lovers this week on Thursday 15th December

 

This week, we’re starting to look back.

To see what has happened as a result of giving peace a year. Just three more meetings to go before our year is complete.

We started because I’d been shocked at my hair conditioner stating it’s intention to fight signs of dryness and started gathering up examples of where violence or violent language had crept into our worlds without us spotting it, and to transform it into what it is we’d really like to have happen. Starting with my hair and the soothing, smoothing and moisturising… better!

We’ve brought a wide variety of things for transformation. And enjoyed ourselves hugely doing it. And the most surprising thing is the effect on things we didn’t bring to work on directly. This aim for peaceful, ‘do no harm’ ways of being has spread without any effort, to other things.

-Family situations turning out so differently from the fighting norm.

-The habitual impulse to criticise in response to criticism usually strong and biting, barely a whimper.

-No effort or hard work but simply the benign presence seemingly dissolving conflict amongst a business group.

These weren’t situations that we worked on directly at all, or even talked about but they turned out differently.

It seems that through the intention to find peaceful nonviolent ways of being, and working on specific situations, has had a wider reach than we imagined.

The qualities we have, that which we are but is often buried and not seen or felt, has been held gently and given the conditions to grow.

And now its presence is being felt.

With no efforting, no doing, it simply is there. Being.

 

I cannot tell you how happy I feel about that.

 

I read this from David Spangler at The Lorian Association this week. It sums up so beautifully the way in which this has worked for us in the group.

“Light does not attack or contest.

Light evokes itself within a system. It’s not so much that we send light to someone or someplace as it is that we evoke through resonance their own light or the light of that situation to emerge and make itself known.

Light operates by changing the environment.

If I step into a dark room and switch on the light, the light doesn’t start fighting the darkness and forcing it to retreat.

The light simply is, and where it is, darkness cannot also be. Light alters the environment whether we’re talking about physical light or sacred light. In a strict sense there can be no warriors of light. Rather light bearers, those who can bring into and evoke from a situation, potential for sacredness in expression. “

And THAT is a joy.

 

Next in person meeting

 

Thursday 5th January, 7.30 – 9pm

The Salisbury Arms Hotel, Hertford

Three meetings till the end of Give Peace a Year

Dates for the rest of the year here
Guidelines for the group here

Email to let me know if you’re coming and we’ll keep you a seat

.

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By Pauline | Posted in Give Peace a Year | Tagged , , |